Hello 2022, We Got This

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Last year I had a long list of things I wanted to accomplish… I did not meet my goal. I am not mad at myself, exactly, but rather realized that maybe I set my bar a little too high?

Last year’s goals were: 12 books, 4-5ks, 12 new recipes, hike 6 new places, blog 12 times, visit 4 new places, and get back to exercise.

What I completed: 6 books read, 6 recipes made, 3 hiking spots, 7 blogs, 3 new places, and have been hit and miss on the exercising.

When I looked at my list about a week ago, I kinda got down on myself. Initial reactions are usually negative when you see that you “failed”… so after seeing my failure I opted to kill time and I started looking at Facebook. From there I went through the over 2000 pictures on my phone, and thats when it hit me, I didnt really ignore my goal, but decided (subconsciously, I would say) that other things were more important.

For the first part of 2021 I had the privilege of watching my granddaughter roughly 3 days a week. The joy that little girl brings is infinitely more important than a nonfiction book. Watching her learn about the world and teaching her simple things like going down a slide, or how to use a fork (semi correctly), or even singing with her make those incomplete 5ks worth it. **I do feel its important to say, with her, I did get my steps in!

Then in June, the next miracle happened, my grandson came into the world. The way he snuggled into my arms and slept for hours and smiled made those missed blogs, trivial.

Then once he was a few months old and my daughter took on a part time job twice a week I would get to keep both the littles for about 3 hours a day. Heaven.

Then there was the career… I never in a million years thought I would be able to have a home and work life balance where I was still making money. Having 12 closings in my “first” year, I call that a huge win! I have never been more happy doing this than I ever did at a 9-5 job – and I get to wear blue jeans without the boss scowling at me!

So, long story short, for 2022 I have no agenda, I have no checklist, I have no self imposed requirements but I do have is hope. Hope that I get to continue to spend time with my family, continue to watch the littles grow up in my family room, continue to build my business, continue to spend time with my friends, maybe make new ones, and just enjoy the year. When Jan of 2023 rolls around I will be happy to look back and see what I have accomplished without the initial guilty feelings, all that I hoped to get done. As I continue on the journey of #becomingabetterme I want to focus on the positive in all things. So maybe I kinda do have a goal – but I think these are the ones I will succeed at with no problem at all.

Cheryl Martin 12/4/57 – 12/26/21

Today was the day we laid my mother to rest. It isn’t always easy to find the words to say, but here is what I said…

I wrote this down in case I had to hand it off to be read, so I apologize if it sounds like an essay from high school.

As I thought about what I wanted to say today, I knew I didn’t want to be too mushy and make everyone cry more than they already have been. So I went back through my memories of my mother and I realized that the ones that really stuck out to me – good and bad – came back to music.

It started when I got my first record player and Mom let me listen to her old 45s… I remember instantly loving Sugar Sugar by the Archies and her singing it to me. She also introduced me to Simon and Garfunkel by playing the opening line of Sounds of Silence on Grandpa’s old organ. I am not sure how old I was when I found out that the song had more words than just “Hello darkness my old friend” but I will never forget her singing and playing that one line over and over.

Then when I became a teenager we always had music going. When Mom was ready to clean she would put Pat Benatar albums on. I loved her music, but I still have PTSD about it, and actually do the same thing in my house now when I am about to do a deep clean. (Sorry kiddos, I am sure I have given you PTSD as well). When it was just us girls and Mom home on Sundays, she would put on an Air Supply album and crochet while sitting in my step dads chair. I kinda think that was her way of boycotting football.

There was one time we took a trip to Pennsylvania for a family members birthday, I remember falling asleep in the car and Mom singing John Denver in my dreams and then waking up to find she was doing it in real life too. I think it was because of that she hypnotized me into buying that album every time I found it at thrift stores.

Even my first concert was something worth mentioning. For my 17^th birthday my mom got me tickets to see Don Henley. At the time, of course I was thrilled, but to look back on it now, it amazes me that as a teenager I got to see the one of the most famous lead singers of any bands.

Even our trips to the grocery store had music in it. There were four of us teenage girls so arguing was a way of life. While at Kroger, if we started to argue Mom would say something like, “Ohh I like this song!” Didn’t matter if it was instrumental, an oldie, or even a Kroger commercial, she would start doing this dance, and oh my goodness was it scary – but it made us stop arguing, scatter, and was a win for Mom in that battle.

The music continued in to my 30s too… when Mom wanted to seal her basement floor at the Emerson House, she called us to help. I know it was Brie, Darin, Mom, Sabin and I down there doing the work. We were just working away and I started singing Turn the Radio Up and Mom, a sucker for harmony, started singing with me. Now, the fumes were pretty serious, so either this happened, or I was super high – but I remember everyone stopping and listened. When we were done Mom said something snappy and everyone clapped –  but again, we were pretty high from the fumes so I am not sure I am remembering that correctly.

When Mom was working on getting the Albany house ready to sell, she asked me come and help her paint the upstairs hall and stairway, so I did. Not long after we started Mom asked me to play some music, so I turned on Pandora and Two Ticket to Paradise came on and she and I started singing. Midway through the song Mom started to giggle, Sabin was standing at the bottom of stairs listening and I vaguely remember her asking him if he was recording us. As I type this I am starting to see that Mom used music to disguise manual labor!

Anywho, from watching her swoon over Steve Perry, who she admitted although he was blessed with an awesome voice he could not dance, to watching Dirty Dancing with her a million times and listening to her tell me that Patrick Swayze could dance and was likely the love of her life because of those dance skills. Taking mom to Beef and Boards to see Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, Seven Brides for Seven Brother, Sound of Music, she would be smiling with every song. I got that same smile when she came to sit in the audience when I had a one and a half min part in Guys and Dolls musical in high school, it has all been about her love of music and passing it on to me.

The music may have stopped playing here on Earth for Mom, but she introduced me to one more song that really makes me think of her now and I would like to share some of the lyrics with you now. It’s a Matthew West song and it goes like this:

 I love you more than the sun
And the stars that I taught how to shine
You are mine, and you shine for me too
I love you yesterday and today
And tomorrow, I’ll say it again and again
I love you more

I love you Momma and I will miss you forever.

Happy Heather’s Day 6/17/2021

This is just a bonus to the blog count for the year, but I felt like I would be cheating myself if I did not mention all that happened around this day… aka my birthday!

Turning 45 seemed weird. As a kid, I never thought about what birthdays would be past sweet 16 or becoming an adult at 18 (which by the way, was not as cool as I thought it would be), or the infamous 21st… but what 30, 35, 40, or 45 looked like was not something that even crossed my mind.

Now as I sit here, thinking about the start of my 45th year, I smile at the great friends I have.

Between facebook, text, instagram, calls, and even snapchat – the wishes and memes came pouring in! I understand that there is a notification when someone has made another trip around the sun, but that doesnt mean that you have to stop and take note, but so many did. By the end of the day I had been contacted by over 150 people! Its mind blowing to think that 150 took time to stop and tell me to have a good day. Honestly, I was humbled.

Anywho, as some of you know, I do not take my birthday lightly… I celebrate for the whole month. This month was a little different, though. Between being busy with work and truthfully just not really feeling it I cut that way down… but my friends and family did not let me crawl under the rock I wanted to crawl under.

For my actual birthday, Angel brought me flowers and took me to brunch. The weather so perfect that we ate on the patio and people watched… definitely one of my favorite pastimes. (that was just day of… there is more with Ang!)

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Then that evening my whole family and great friends (the Pettys) came to have dinner with me. There was fun had by all, and lots of food to boot!

The following weekend (the 22nd) Jenn and I went to Midland Antique Mall to look around (and did we find some doosies!) and then to Bottleworks (Pins) for some beverages and fun. Followed by the Garage for dinner then the new Living Room Theater for a movie, only to return to Pins for another drink. She and I have such the greatest conversations and her competitive spirit makes me laugh! **yes, Jenn, I will admit it, you beat me in Bocce ball!

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The following Sat (the 26th) Ang and I are back at it! Hairbangers Ball at Mallow Run. What else could possibly scream HAPPY 45th BIRTHDAY more than watching an 80s hair band cover all the oldies?! So much fun! It is such a blessing to have a friend who gets you and makes feeling old a good thing!

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So here is where my lesson comes in… I try to always look at the bright side of things and even though I am growing ever closer to the big 5-0, I have shared a lot of adventures, fun, milestones, tears, and laughs with so many that being on this journey of #becomingabetterme has been an amazing and wild ride. As I look back on all of the birthdays of my past I never thought I would be so lucky!

Thank you all once again. I love you and #becomingabetterme is easier because I have you!

And Now May is a Wrap – Recap and Goal Check In

I think I blinked. How in the world are we to the end of May?? Anywho, for as fast as it was, I made it through and even got to check some things off of personal to do list as well as learn some things about myself.

I will start with the simple things – my list. (if you need a reminder of what is on the list I wrote my January post about what I was doing in 2021, or at least my TO DO list for the year)

Blog post for every month – check! you are reading Mays!

Book – check! I picked another one of the Reese Witherspoon book club choices, and although not one I would have picked with her seal of approval, I liked it. The Last Thing He Told Me… in a nutshell, it was about what a person would do to take care of the people they love, and what they are willing to give up to keep loved ones safe. Of course there was a bit of mystery, a bit of FBI stuff, and a successful artist in it, but the main idea is giving up what you love because the person you love asked you to. *as I was reading it I struggled with the main characters decision, but when you love someone and they ask you to let go, I guess you have to? Not a spoiler I promise.

New dish – omgoodness…. so before I tell you what we made, please know I am big fan of French Onion soup and as I have my favorite restaurant styles, I have really become a fan of the stuff we make at home. That being said, we found a recipe for French Onion Soup Pasta! It was so good that after we made it the first time, we had to invite family over to show them the glory of this dish…. craziness. (recipe found on myrecipes.com and just FYI, use Romano instead of parm!! trust me you will love it!)

So those are the check marks for the month, according to the list. That doesn’t mean I sat on my backside the rest of the month!

Angel and I got our hands dirty by doing another Wine and Vine. There is something about arranging plants in a big oversized pot and mixing colors and types of flowers that is just relaxing. I am happy to announce that we did this the 15th of the month and my flowers are still alive and perky! (I picked a lot of red because they draw in my hummingbabies and I want to make them as happy as I am!)

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  Audrey smelling the flowers I put together at Wine and Vine

Then there is work… I hate calling it that as I am finally living my dream of helping people through the home buying process and enjoying the showing so many different types of homes of all ages and the different styles of decor, it really is my passion… anywho in the month of May I believe I showed something like 50 homes?? It might sound like a crazy amount of windshield time (and it is) but seeing the face of a client when they find out their offer has been accepted – ESPECIALLY IN THIS MARKET – is a thing of beauty.

The grandbaby… what can I say about her except spending time with her just fills me up.She is so smart and definitely finding her own personality! Her love of music is definitely something her MiMi gave her, but don’t tell her Momma I said that, because she thinks it came from her! She is just so much love, stubbornness, adventure, and beauty in one very tiny human! I can’t believe that little monkey of mine is going to be a big sister here in just a few short weeks! I spent a little extra time with her in May and I loved every second of it.

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So what did I learn about myself in May? Actually it was probably more things that were reiterated rather than learned… I remembered how fierce I could be when there is something I want. How even when I am scared to death, I will put on my big girl pants and do whatever I need to do to succeed. I learned that when you are your own boss you can’t put the blame on someone else because you are that someone else. I remembered that I love with all of my heart, sometimes even when that love is not returned, but I refuse to let it be my downfall. Anywho, point is, with the world opening back up, I am being forced to look in the mirror and figure out what I want and how I plan to get it. I am not allowed to use the excuse that we are all quarantined and that is why I am not out there. As I would say before any race or big task “Its go time, Cupcake” and I am doing it.

So to end this months check in I will tell you what you have to look forward to:

1. I started a 90 day challenge: #autumnbod its a 10/10/10 x 3 deal – 10 sit ups, 10 push ups, and 10 squats morning, noon, and night – and every few days the numbers go up. I started that 5/28 and yes, I have missed a couple of work outs, but I was busy dead lifting a toddler to save her from disaster or sudden death, so that counts.
2. As I am doing more with my career, I am reading a Dave Ramsey book for June. I am NOT a fan of nonfiction, so this is a challenge all by itself.
3. There are already some new hiking places on the list for the next few weeks so I might have that part of my to do list checked off by the end of the month! **hoping that will also roll into a couple of 5ks!
4. Lastly, have been looking for some weekend places to get away and check off new places, so I will keep you posted on that as well.

As I always have to come full circle with my posts, here is the little #becomingabetterme plug – I will be 45 in 17 short days and since March of last year I have not really felt like myself. I know I am not the only one, and actually having covid for 90% of April didn’t really help, but seeing that I am checking things off my list, and even adding to it shows me that I have accepted rather than feared change or challenge. That I have not shied away for fear of failure, but rather tucked head and plowed my shoulder through whatever obstacle was in my path – or at least I am trying. For me and who I was just 5 years ago, that is a huge accomplishment. Thank you for taking this journey of #becomingabetterme with me.

So I Got Behind – March and April.

Well Hello Again. This has been a crazy few months for me!

March:

At the beginning of March Jenn and I went to Madison Indiana for a day trip. We planned to got to the Lanither Mansion and get pizza, but that plan was kicked in the butt by covid hours of the mansion. We still took a walk around the grounds and went to their winery (oh shucks we had to go have wine). We also took a side trip over to Clifty Falls and walked their trail that goes to one of their most well know waterfalls. We also walked up and down main street looking at the boutiques and just having a great day. (This checked off 1 new place/park to hike, Only 5 more to go)

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Also in March Angel and I took a new trail (new to us) in Plainfield. It was kinda chilly that day so it was only about a mile and half, but it counts. That makes 2 of my 6 for the year!

March also held a new recipe. The hubs and I tried a Scillian meat roll. Which is really like a mozzarella and prosciutto meatloaf. I would have loved to show the picture, but although it tasted good, it did not photograph well.

I also met my book of the month goal… I read The Girl He Used to Know – it was about a girl who runs into a boy she dated in college, and after being called weird most of her life she finds out she was on the autism spectrum and he helps her navigate her new found diagnosis. It was a good and quick read.

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Last big point for March was 3 closings! I was so happy to find 3 families their very own homes! Believe it or not, doing that made getting all of those other things in even harder!

April:

April was horrible… I got sick on April 4th, was tested for covid on April 6th, and got my positive results on April 8th. From there it was 3+ weeks of sleeping, fevering, not smelling, or tasting, and generally feeling like death.

Although there was no hiking, cooking, exploring new places, or even leaving my bedroom, I did manage to get my book read (albeit it took through the first month of May to get completed, but I stayed on task).

OOH!! and I almost forgot, I had a closing at the end of April too! It was a joy to get another happy family their new home on the heels of being sicker than a dog!

As it is the last week of May and I have plans for later this week and the weekend, I will be ready to give you a happy update on May as soon as the month is over!

I have enjoyed this holding myself accountable to these small 2021 goal. I know they are not anything special, but while trying #becomingabetterme its good to know I can still keep going even when life is not 9-5 anymore!

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February Check In

As I posted last month this year I have a TO DO list and I am already on it! We are now 7 weeks in and I have some check marks to report!

A recipe a month, January was bread. Yeah, you read that right. I baked. With the help of the hubs we made homemade bread. I was 1. very proud of myself. Yes, I had help, but still, it was something out of my comfort zone and I (we) succeeded. 2. surprised how I just jumped in without fear or anxiety, which I would have done in the past!

A book a month, to better track my books and the dates they were started and completed, I created an account on Good Reads (feel free to connect with me there if you want!) I am actually ahead of schedule!

January I read one – The Knowledge of Angels, Then February I read two books – The Whisper Network (which was a Reese Witherspoon book club selection) and then The Girl He used to Know. This one was really good. I cannot say that I related to any of the main characters, but (without giving anything away) the timeline was September of 2001 in New York and I remember how I felt seeing it on TV. Could not imagine having anyone up close to the situation.

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Hike and 5k’ing – although I have not done these yet (thank you Mother Nature), I have made plans and found locations that this will be happening! So I call that positive yardage!

Although not on the personal list, I thought I would share that in the last 2 weeks I have really been moving and shaking in real estate! There were several times in 2020 that I thought about throwing in the towel. I am so glad I pulled up my big girl pants and kept going because I have done exactly what I have wanted to do – help people find homes and happiness!

Also as an update, Miss Audrey is going to be a big sister and we now know the gender of the new baby:

I realize there is no big lesson learned or moral to the story, but sometimes while the process of #becomingabetterme the small accomplishments have to recognized just as much as the big ones.

TO DO LIST – 2021, You Better Step Up

It is no secret that 2020 was, excuse my language, a SHIT SHOW, but I have decided to put the negativity behind me and move into the New Year with a plan and new sense of purpose. I am not going to say “new year, new me”, because that would be a lie – and honestly, I like this me, but I do want to be better. So I will say “NEW YEAR, BETTER ME”I have spent a lot of the last few weeks trying to come of up with a list of TO DOs that can be achieved regardless of the state of the world, so here goes:

Read 12 books (1 per month): I miss book club, so I will do this on my own then give a small book report as a check in.

Do 4 – 5ks, even if they are virtual: Color me crazy, but I loved the medals, it felt like I accomplished something and it kept me going.

Try 12 new recipes (1 per month): I have become a foodie over the last year and I want to continue broadening my horizons.

Walk/Hike in 6 new parks (new to me): I have a comfort zone when it comes to hikes because I know what to expect, I like reminding myself that nothing cool happens in the ones comfort zone.

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Blog at least 12 times (1 per month): When I started this blog it was kind of my weight loss journey/journal, however it was meant to be more about the my journey and when I stopped exercising, I stopped posting. That is not all that this is supposed to be about. #becomingabetterme was meant to be a well-rounded story of who I am and what I want and do with myself so I can look at me in the mirror and know that each day I am giving it my all.

Sure there are a ton of things on my bucket list, like travel and shows and adventure, but I am going back to the basics. 2020 is in the rearview, and it can stay there. I am looking forward to what this year can bring and all of the successes during the journey of #becomingabetterme I can share with you.

Meet My Crew

Marketing… not the easiest thing in the world. Now that I am on a different path it is something that that become part of my everyday existence. Not cool bro, not cool. I just want to help people, I dont want to post my picture on billboards or bus stop benches, but this is my life now.

Anywho, in a morning conversation with the hubs a lot of things became clear. Marketing isn’t just about park benches or public bus sides, and it doesn’t mean that you have to talk about yourself all of the time. Its about connecting with others and enjoying yourself, then the business just organically happens. People don’t JUST buy services, they buy experiences and friendships.

After a day of noodling this concept (and several cups of coffee later) a plan was in place. I was going to do this new thing. Talking to my small business owner friends and those go-getters that I have loved and respected for years over coffee and in front of a screen for everyone else to see.

I have no idea where this is going to go, or how long it will take to get through all of my friends, but I am going to do it.

Here is the short video I called Coffee Chat (the preview). Give it a watch, maybe subscribe, and lets see where this thing goes???

After all, I can’t continue #becomingabetterme if I don’t step outside of my comfort zone and try something different, right?

Branding and Sales… how Wonder Woman Does It!

This year has been a whole lot of things… some of which are words a person should not use, (My grandma told me that if I couldnt say anything nice then I should keep my trap shut, so that is what I am doing) but there have been some positives that have come out of 2020.

As everyone knows I took another step on the path of #becomingabetterme and decided (with a bit of a nudge from the hubs) to go for my dream career in real estate. So far, although challenging, it has been a wonderful new adventure for me.

After paying my dues – literally my membership dues – my next step was to create a work space that truly felt conducive to work. DONE

 

Next was setting up a Facebook and Istagram business page. ALSO DONE.

Then came finding the clients. So that part is not easy and always a work in progress.

See, for those of you who do not know me personally, I am not a salesperson. I have no desire to try to sell you on who I am. I am me. Like me, loathe me – whatever, I am me… but it was pointed out to me that I have already sold myself. I was me for so long and let my love of Wonder Woman shine  (and a constant display of #wonderwomanfriday) that when you think of Heather, you think of Wonder Woman.

Then came Audrey, my sweet granddaughter who changed my whole life and gave me a new hashtag #mimilife … after numerous posts about her (to my facebook and instagram friends, I will not apologize, but rather tell you that you are welcome. Getting a dose of that sweetness as often as you do is enough to turn any frown upside down!) I now get recognition for being one heck of a MiMi.

After figuring out that I  have set my own stage, and created a presence of Wonder Woman MiMi (no… not looking to make that stick!) I am trying to make my mark on the real estate industry.

My mentor and husband, both, suggested I try to take my brand to the YouTube stage. Talk about real estate there… so I did. Heather Hamm – Realtor.

So for my debut on YouTube, I called in back up… Miss Thang (as I like to call her) helped with this video because cuteness goes a long way!

 

If you would be so kind, following me and liking my pages on YouTube, Facebook, and Instagram would be great… you never know what I might say or do, but one thing is for sure, I will be trying to #becomingabetterme on every platform I make my mark on!

March/April What the Quarantine 2020

I have been mulling over how I was or if I was going to write about this on my blog for a couple of weeks now… then I remembered my promise to my readers and myself, all of my journey – good, bad, and ugly, right? Well, this has been all of those things.

When things started to get sketchy back in February, I started my phase one: pre-panic mode. Trying to decide how this was going to effect my family, my friend, my job, the city… I am sure I even got concerned about Santa’s well-being, because I am that much of a worrier. Then as days rolled on and we were into March, I was walking around wondering all of that even deeper… what exactly is this virus? Sure Human Corona virus is as old as the common cold, it even has a lot of the same symptoms – effecting the upper respiratory tract, but this new one, a novel one…  that was one I wanted to know about. Since I had zero real information I went into heather’s reaction phase two: pre freak out phase. This phase usually involves planning for future cleaning… We expected that if we were going to be in lock down – which at this point parts of China, Italy, and France were – the kids would come here to make sure they had the food they needed. So planning included decided how or if furniture needed moved or rearranged, and what accommodations would be required for specific people – and when it came down to it, my biggest concern was my grandbaby.

Phase three came: “Shelter in Place” ok… not a horrible thing to call it, especially since I was using words like “lockdown”, “quarantine”, “isolation” and I think I even called it “house arrest” a couple of times. Anywho, as shelter in place began, I was ok. I am good when I have tasks that I am responsible for, so I did my duty. I cooked, I cleaned, I arranged furniture, I did laundry, and I even helped with the baby. I was in Go-Mode. For the first 10 days’ish I was ok…ish.

Then as my granddaughter had a doctors appt she could not miss, my daughter and her fiancé went home. The house was empty…. still well over 3 week of (I think at this point I called it Hell, I believe that was the name I then gave it) shelter in place I had no task, no purpose, nothing to do – and that is when the emotions flooded in. I became a mess. I cried like every day, I had horrible dreams at night, and I am pretty sure I didn’t really make contact with anyone for about 3 days.

As most of my posts have them, here is where the positive change comes in…

I don’t really know what day it was, but I woke up and decided I was done feeling like poop so I stopped. I asked the hubs to move the Xbox Kinect up to the family room so I could use my Zumba and Just Dance to get myself moving again. He did and I did. Zumba 4 days in a row and then weights the 5th day. I also (with the help of Grandpa and my daughter – at safe distances) we cleared out the dead bushes in my yard and cleaned out the flower beds. Took a couple of walks down the street in the evening when it was warm enough and hold on to your tops folks – I JOGGED. Yup, you read that right. I jogged! It wasn’t far and it wasn’t fast, but I jogged.

Something else that has really helped me stay on the positive side is cooking. I have always loved to cook, but having the time to create new dishes, tweak old ones, and even just making a favorite has helped me keep going.

So, I guess you can say I went into phase three: the positive phase. I remembered that I can only handle what I can handle, can only fix what I can fix, and can only be what I want to be… and that is a happy person. It has not been easy, folks, it never is… but I really do try to find as many silver linings as I can.

As for the “shelter in place” order (which I am now calling “all day jammies” order), it is up May 1st.  That does not mean the virus is just gone that day, or expired or whatever, but it seems that maybe things are looking better? I will still be cautious, I will still probably stay home a little longer, but at least I can do that now feeling that I am the best me when I wake up every morning. I try to take a lesson from everything that happens and in this journey of #becomingabetterme, lessons are everywhere – and in this case it was in the middle of a pandemic and it reminded me that life goes on and you have to slow down and take a mental picture of the happy things that you do have.